Dear fellow travelers,
Thank you again for your responses.
This pondering was intense for me to write, because it involves friends I feel great empathy for.
I have two friends and a cousin, whose lives have taken them on journeys to places they probably never dreamed they would be on at this time last year. All of these journeys are health related.
I do have much training on my thought processes in these areas, and I know its not mine to decide or to understand the reasons "why". I know the highest and best for them. but I admit I got really "angry" last week, deciding what I thought was "unfair" for them. These beautiful lovely lights having these challenging paths.
I know the medical community witnesses these situations everyday and in my life at times, I certainly have also.
I believe my recent "upset" was having a culmination of information about these three friends at one time and the fact I admire and care so much about all of them.
When I volunteered at a cancer wellness center, the women I encountered seem to all have a positive, upbeat attitude. They felt they had learned a lot from their illnesses.
They learned to first take care of themselves; to live for the moment, and to be grateful for everyday.
Sunday, my cousin, who is this beautiful, vibrate, upbeat, witty and caring person, talked opening about her journey since last August. With her permission, she said I could write about her.
Her journey began with a seizure, quickly, thru many tests, a brain mass was uncovered. She had the operation but all the tumor couldn't be removed and it had tentacles going further into her brain. It was benign, but could cause the loss of many skills. She was treated as a cancer patient. She had six weeks, 5 days a week of radiation. She described the treatments to us.
Her last treatment was last week.
She told me, she feels she was chosen to have this happen to her, for whatever reason. And what she found out about herself is: that she is stronger than she ever knew she was, she is grateful for every day and she is grateful she still has her cognitive abilities, even thru her right side has slight feeling problems, and she still has minor seizures. She knows some of the tumor remains. The radiation was to reduce the size. She participates in a blog called " It's just benign". and I'm sure she is a great inspiration to many. She certainly is to me. When she was asked by the staff if she wanted medicine before her treatments, she said, "No, I will put myself in a peaceful place". and on her last day of her treatments, she took cookies to the staffs on all the floors she had been on.
Now, is this an earth angel??
My other two friends have different journeys but are to me also an inspiration of courage and strength. and they demonstrate this great courage to all the people around them.
A memory came up from many years ago from someone else who inspired me. She was an older co-worker who just had had her first and only baby, and she had had a difficult pregnancy. Her day old baby had been rushed by helicopter to another hospital for emergency heart surgery.
On my drive to the hospital to see her, I remember I was breathing deep all the way there. "What was I possibly going to say to her, beyond the usual things one says?"
As my experiences seem to be, she gave me the pep talk. "I had so many issues while I was pregnant, God will not take my baby away now."
She was right. Her baby lived!!!!!!!!!!! I saw them both a year ago, many years older and looking good!
Life is hills and valleys, and it is my job to live everyday, as I learn constantly from my friends, with gratitude, gratefulness and joy. I have so much to be grateful for. We all do, even if it is difficult some times to know it, or feel it, there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for. Look deep and the more you will see, and then the more you will see!!
ALWAYS.
Living in gratitude, for the people I am fortunate to know and all the great gifts I have. You are one of them, and for this I say thank you.
What are you grateful for?
Just pondering,
Linda P RScP, ENTC
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